How to know how much your child should be eating
Inside: Not sure how much your child should be eating or if they are getting enough? Learn how to know if your child is eating enough, how to recognize hunger and fullness in your child, factors that impact appetite, and age appropriate portion sizes.
The information here is strictly educational and not medical advice. It should not substitute professional medical consultation.
As parents, it can be challenging to gauge the right portion sizes for our children. There are so many factors that can influence how much a child eats and it can vary from child to child and even day to day. Understanding responsive feeding, recognizing hunger and fullness cues, and factors that impact appetite can help make this task a little easier.
Responsive Feeding
Knowing how much food to give your children can be difficult to judge. Children are actually pretty great at regulating their own appetite and knowing how much their little bodies need, if we let them. Which can be hard for many parents who prefer to know exactly how much they should be feeding their children and want a guide to go off.
Our job as the caregiver is to practice what is called responsive feeding. This is about recognizing our childs hunger and fullness signals and helping them learn to follow their own internal signals while they are learning to eat. Just like any other skill, it takes our children time to learn these hunger and fullness cues.
Parents decide when, where, and what is offered to the child. The child decides if and how much to eat. So it is up to us as the caregiver to help guide them, without pressuring to eat, and the child guides their own hunger and fullness.
Encouragement or pressure to eat (“just take one bite”, “finish your broccoli and you can be done”), while common and almost natural reactions for caregivers, can actually prevent children from responding to their own hunger or fullness cues and listening to their bodies, potentially causing them to overeat. It may even stop them from enjoying the mealtime environment all together and cause resistance to trying new foods or coming to the table. Pressure to eat rarely helps most children in the long run.
Responsive feeding involves recognizing and responding to your child's hunger and fullness signals. Children are generally good at regulating their own appetites if given the chance. Here are some tips to support a responsive feeding environment:
Create a mealtime structure: Establish a routine for meals that is spaced appropriately for your child’s age. This helps them predict meal times and eat at regular intervals.
Offer a variety of foods: Even if your child initially refuses them, continue to offer a wide variety of foods.
Keep mealtimes pressure-free: Ensure that mealtime comments are neutral or positive.
Watch for hunger/fullness cues: Respond appropriately to signs that your child wants more food or is finished.
Encourage positive conversations: Engage in pleasant mealtime discussions.
Model behaviors: Show your child the behaviors you want them to emulate.
Hunger and Fullness Cues
It's important to recognize when your child has had enough to eat so we can respond and end the meal. Prolonging a meal when your child has shown signs of completion or being full can result in more stress for both the child and the caregiver. Some signs that your child wants to stop eating include:
Crying during the meal
Saying "no" or "all done"
Clamping their mouth shut
Pushing their plate or food away
Throwing food
It is okay to hold boundaries as the parent, and you might be surprised just how well your children actually THRIVE within the structure you set for them. But remember to hold boundaries in a neutral way without the pressure. Your child may choose not to eat, but they will have another opportunity soon once you’ve set the routine.
Factors Affecting Appetite
Understanding what impacts our child’s appetite can help us as caregivers know what to expect and reduce a lot of unknown or worry.
Children’s appetites can vary greatly due to several factors:
Growth phases
Teething
Illness
Activity levels
Fatigue
Distractions
Meal environment
Individual preferences
Growth spurts
These fluctuations are normal. As the caregiver, you stay in the driver seat of the eating routine/structure, while allowing them to monitor the gauges on how empty or full the tank is.
General Portion Sizes
As caregivers, we just want our kids to eat so we know they are getting what they need. Sometimes we fear they aren’t eating enough so we compensate by adding even more to their plate hoping they’ll eat enough.
But, adding too much to their plate can actually cause a lot of pressure for kids, ultimately resulting in them not eating.
Smaller portions tend to be less overwhelming, especially with new foods. It also allows your child to signal for more food if they want it and allows them to refuse part of a meal if they don’t want it.
What is a “small” portion?
To alleviate some concerns, here's a general guideline for portion sizes based on age
Remember, these are just guidelines. Children’s needs can vary based on growth, development, and activity levels. Start with smaller portions and allow your child to ask for more if they are still hungry. It’s more important to focus on providing a nutrient-dense, varied diet.
If any of these foods are “learning to like” foods for your child, you can start with even LESS than what is listed here. Offering a tiny amount of a new food may help expose them in a less intimidating way.
Nonetheless, remember that children get their nutrient needs met over several days, not in one given meal or one given day. Don’t expect their meals to be perfect or expect them to clear their plates at every meal. There may even be days that you aren’t able to get them to eat one of the recommended servings, and that is OKAY. Aim for a consistently balanced diet of a wide variety of foods and lean into your roles as the caregiver.
Conclusion
Understanding and implementing responsive feeding can help create a positive mealtime environment and support your child's ability to regulate their own appetite. By offering a variety of foods without pressure and recognizing their hunger and fullness cues, you'll be helping your child develop healthy eating habits that will last a lifetime.
If you are looking for more 1-on-1 guidance have questions about your child’s eating behaviors, click here to get support!
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Medical/General: The content, information, opinions, and suggestions listed here have been created with typically developing children and babies in mind. The information here is generalized for a broad audience. The information here should by no means be used as a substitute for medical advice or for any circumstance be used in place of emergency services. Your child is an individual and may have needs or considerations beyond generally accepted practices. If your child has underlying medical or developmental differences, including but not limited to prematurity, developmental delay, sensory processing differences, gastrointestinal differences, cardiopulmonary disease processes, or neurological differences, we strongly recommend you discuss your child's feeding plan with the child's doctor, health care provider or therapy team. By accessing this site and the information in it, you acknowledge and agree that you are accepting responsibility for your child’s health and well-being. By using and accepting the information on this site, the author (Cierra Crowley) is not responsible for any adverse effects or consequences resulting from the use of any suggestions discussed. It is important to talk to your child’s pediatrician or medical provider to start anything new or make any changes.
Affiliation: this page contains affiliate links from which I can earn small commissions (at no additional cost to you).
